What a Crayon Perhaps Hears...

Well this was the title of a 9th grade poem i wrote.
but today its some of my thoughts.

i wonder as i sit next to the kids in Sunday school and color a picture with these old peeling crayons, what they have heard for so long.
Children laughing and crying.
maybe they felt the anger when some young child needed to draw a picture to get out how hurt they were...
i wonder if while i sit at home with my new crayons if they hear each tear as if it was a tidal wave when it hits the paper that i find myself coloring to try to get close to expressing my emotions.
i wonder if it feels the amazement of a child when they first pick up a crayon and realize the power of wax and art.
 i wonder if it hears the inspirations that artist get by the way the crayon is being pressed against the paper.
i cant help but wonder what it would be like to put that kind of color into the world. that kind of joy and that kind of release.
things would be different.
i would bring happiness to the lives around me.

but i would want to be some exotic beautiful color that people searched and searched for because i was only in one box. that box would belong to a child. i would be there to hear them laugh and cry and maybe one day with there parents they would mend me into another color melting me with some old crayons and some new beautiful crayons. and we crayons would share our memories of this child and we would all grow old together and then the crayon would be passed down. and we would relive each memory over and over like our life never ended, it would start new with each new owner. oh that would be the life. but i am human of course and now i sit here and wonder how can i bring joy and happiness to people of the world?
can i be that ongoing emotional warrior... taking away the pain of people who are hurting around me and celebrating with them when they are happy?

 i will continue to ponder these thoughts for a while... i think Railton would be a good start to being a crayon and make a difference.

The Ultimate Boss

this is from my journal back senior year. but again thought i would share it with you:


Finally a spiritual connection. My mind can't stop thinking of him. The love of my life, my best friend, my savior, the creator and ultimate counselor. The bond of life between us is unimaginable. And why? Because He is in control, so everything will be ok. Now a new bond will be shared. Thr time has come for me to step out of this teenage bubble and look at this new world. A world in need of Christ. A world longing for Him. With people like me, ready to go and serve, to go out and make peoples lives and their salvation the main focus of our own lives. As God prepares my heart to live and work for Him I shudder, but not with fear, with anticipation. I get to work for the ultimate boss!

Man

I posted this on Facebook a while ago but i thought i would post it on here. :)


I sit around waiting for something to happen. 


Waiting for the man God has in line for me to just fall out of the sky. I don't know why this subject over powers my thoughts and dreams. But I am just so anxious to see who God has made to marry me! All of his works are amazing and I can't help but think how God made some guy who is just perfect for me. 


I'm his juliet, his other half.. I'm his Eve. I long for the day I meet my Adam.


Its hard for me to imagine any one less then Gods standards marrying me. 


He has this huge plan for me. Just for me. At some point my plan and some mans plan are going to become one plan.

And for now I am so happy until that man comes along and God tells us its time, I have the ultimate husband, the ultimate friend, the lover of my soul. An everlasting unconditional love. 

3 letters down...37 to go.

Well last night i had some catching up to do on my letters since i started late. i have to say this is just wonderful and eye opening. each one of these people have had a big role in shaping me into who i am today. i am enjoying thinking and praying for each one of them. Remembering the times in which i can say was a big moment of change because of them. I am enjoying that God has brought each one of these people to mind so that i can reflect on our relationships. this post isn't going to be long cause i don't have to much to say. but i want you to know i have been challenged from this already to be more thankful for all i have.

and to update you all on other news. this lent i am going to be wearing only one pair of shoes. i will be wearing them everyday for everything. to remember and pray for the countries struggling with poverty and the children and parents that hardly have anything to wear on the back let alone there feet. so even when i have to duct tape my shoes i want to have even a slight glimpse of what it would be like to be in their shoes.

Entering the Season of Lent

Well i am a little late on starting this whole thing but i have finally decided what i am giving up, or i guess taking on for lent. i will be sacrificing time on Facebook to take time to be thankful for the forty most influential people in my life.  i will be hand writing letters to each one of them. I have had a wonderful and large group of people that have surrounded me at different points in my life. I am taking this time to reflect on my blessings and sacrifice the distractions of others on Facebook, and i am going to be just focusing on thanksgiving for them and there life and praising God for his great works and all of the amazing people he has placed in my life. I will be blogging about this journey and as you read this you should think of the people you are thankful for. send them a letter or and email or a phone call or text message. It will make their day.